Wednesday, April 29, 2015

3 Things: The Awful Movies Edition

Today has been such a strange day. The weather is amazing, the sun shining, and I had big plans to tackle a bunch of errands and take the kids to the park. Audrey woke up so early this morning that the kids ending up being dressed, fed and out the door before the anything was actually open. It kind of threw me off as we ended up having to wait around for twenty minutes for the library to open (they keep telling me we didn't return a book and now owe four sheep, two goats and our first born in late fees. Lies I tell you! It was returned). We ran to the grocery store and a few other places and then hit the park. Audrey, my normally happy go lucky child, temporarily lost her mind and was a scream-y nightmare. Yikes. We went home and when I got to the driveway there were three cars parked and a bunch of women standing around waiting for me to get the meeting started. Wrong house ladies.

Anyway, weird day that hasn't gone as planned.  Let's move on to some other things that we've been up to:

Audrey is not having any of it. None.

Reading:  The Fruit Gardener's Bible. 
 Image result for fruit gardener's bible

I bought this for Sean for Christmas because in late Fall he started talking about how he wanted to grow some fruit trees and shrubs. I got this on a total whim, because he is impossible to shop for and all-knowing Amazon suggested it. Well it was a huge hit and he reads this every night to check and recheck that he's planting/pruning/dedicating his life to these trees in all the correct ways. Have I mentioned we're growing fruit trees? Like, a lot of them? 

Watching:  Okay, go ahead and grab a snack before you settle in because I have MANY FEELINGS on the two movies we watched this week and it is my obligation to share them with you so that you don't make the same mistakes. Cue PSA. 


We watched Woody Allen's "Magic in the Moonlight"  at my insistence I'm afraid to say. I saw "Midnight in Paris" and I really enjoyed it and thought that this would be in the same vein. It stars Colin Firth (World's Most Charming Actor) and Emma Stone (World's Most Charming Actress).  It's set in 1928 in France (the costumes! the cars! the scenery!). He plays a curmudgeonly illusionist and she's a sassy medium who he is trying to disprove. Everything about this should work. And He comes off as supremely unlikable, she's wishy washy, and they look like father and daughter. There is no chemistry whatsoever and the whole thing was just a mess. 
Don't even get me started on his stage persona "Wei Ling Soo". Oh yeah, his stage character is a stereotypical Chinese "mystic" complete with heavy eye makeup and a stick-on Fu Manchu. Who on God's green earth decided it was a good idea to put Colin Firth, one of the whitest men alive, in such a horribly racist costume? Why did he go along with it? I realize it was set in 1928 but it was filmed and shown in modern day. It was so off-putting and distracted from the whole film. Why couldn't he have just worn a mask or something if they needed to hide his identity? Why the overtly racist getup? So many questions, zero good answers. Beyond awful.  

The other movie was "Exodus: Gods and Kings". It was a remake of "The 10 Commandments" and you should just see the original. There was nothing special or unique about the remake. Seriously miscast in my opinion, I mean, Sigourney Weaver as Ramses mother? Say what? It was like she'd just gotten off a plane from Minneapolis and someone yelled "Action!". Through the whole thing I kept suggesting that we just go watch the original but Sean felt like we had committed already so we stuck it out, much to my displeasure. 

Clearly, I need better guidance in picking movies. 

Listening: "Woman Woman" by AWOLNATION. I like a handful of songs by this band but a lot of their music is a little too hard rock or electronic for my taste. I know, I have sensitive lady ears. However, this song is one I have been loving lately. The rest of the album is kind of meh, but "Woman Woman" makes me feel like I need to strut around and maybe flip my hair seductively. Rest assured, I won't actually do that, because I know you were worried. At least I won't do it when other people are around, I won't make promises for when the kids are napping and I'm alone.

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